Why Am I Feeling On Edge All The Time? 3 Ways To Begin Exploring and Processing Trauma and Emotions.

Our mind and bodies do their best to help us survive in any situation, but when living in a constant state of survival mode, we begin to see an impact on our daily lives. Maybe you're feeling like you are unable to control your emotions; being quick to anger or isolating yourself from the world. Maybe you are feeling a lack of connection in relationships which is leading to feeling alone and misunderstood by many people. Or maybe you are feeling this tension within your body that you aren't able to release, making you uncomfortable and confused. You're not alone, you're in survival mode.

There are things we can do right now to move ourselves to a life out of survival mode. But first, let's briefly talk about how our nervous system responds to this stress.

Our Nervous System on Trauma

The regulation of our body can be attributed to the autonomic nervous system (ANS), which balances our parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems. Our sympathetic nervous system responds to allow us to survive in dangerous situations, while our parasympathetic nervous system is when our bodies are able to rest and restore. These systems ideally should balance each other out and stay in a regulated state. When we are put in survival mode, especially at a young age, our bodies are constantly using the sympathetic nervous system to respond to situations in order to, well, survive.

For example, an air conditioner will maintain homeostasis of a set temperature. It will work to balance it's cooling and heating system in order to maintain that homeostasis. When the temperature outside isn't too hot, it will be able to maintain this system for quite some time. if the temperature outside is extremely hot and maintains this temperature for a long time, the homeostasis of the air conditioner will increase due to the amount of work the air conditioner is putting in. This increase of work on the air conditioner requires more energy to be exerted at all times.

Now think of yourself as the air conditioner. Your "homeostasis" is where you operate on a day-to-day basis. Your homeostasis is the balance between your sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems. But when you are utilizing your sympathetic nervous system constantly (think of a really hot day) your body is going into overdrive to help you survive, therefore, your homeostasis is no longer a balance between parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems, your body is focused on surviving. The air conditioner that is having to constantly run hot day after hot day will eventually tire out. A human that has been living in survival mode will also eventually tire out.
It makes sense why you feel like you have been so quick to anger or unable to control your emotions. It makes sense why you feel you haven't been able to relax this deep-rooted tension throughout your body. It makes sense why you may have a hard time connecting with others. It makes sense. And you are not alone. Let's discuss a few things you can do today to take a step towards a journey of processing trauma and healing!

But How Do I Begin to Process Trauma?

#1 Grounding (Somatic)

Grounding provides our sympathetic nervous system with messages saying that we are "safe" and allows us to move from a state of survival. Grounding brings awareness to our bodies and allows us to feel what is happening within. These grounding activities are beneficial to do not only when we are feeling on edge, but a great practice to add to our everyday life.

1. Ice Water or Ice cubes (holding ice cubes, drinking cold water, or running cold water over hands, chest, or face!).

2. Identify five things you can see, four things you can feel, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste.

3. Stand tall with your spine stacked and feet firmly placed on the ground. Identify the feeling of the alignment of your body with your feet firmly on the ground.

Start to notice how your body responds and what it feels like. Where do you feel it in your body? What color is the feeling? Does it have a texture? Does it feel soft, scratchy, or something else? Begin to notice when these feelings arise and sit with them for a moment.

#2 Joyful Movement

Movement should be joyful, always! Ask your body what it feels like doing, encourage your body but don't force it. We cannot destroy energy, we can only transform it, and emotions are energy. Moving our body can help us physically process the energy that emotions hold. Here are some ideas to get you started:

1. Walking. Going on a walk around your neighborhood can also allow you to utilize your senses and practice mindfulness.

2. Stretching can activate your parasympathetic nervous system and increase calmness throughout your body.

3. Dance! Tap into your inner child and have a spontaneous dance party in your living room.

Move your body AND be kind to your body.

#3 Awareness

A journey of healing is such a unique and beautiful (but also painful) process that can happen in so many different ways. Bringing awareness to your experiences and feelings without judgment is an important first step in your healing journey. Here are a few of my favorite activities to bring awareness to your body and thoughts:

1. Guided meditation. This can assist you in opening space to notice those sensations and thoughts that are happening every day in your body and mind.

2. Journal your thoughts and see where it takes you. Journaling does not have to be pretty. It can be scribbled, spoken, drawn, or danced through.

3. Sit in silence. When was the last time you just sat there and didn't become distracted? Notice the sensations and feelings that arise. Is your body wanting to move? Fidget? What is coming up in your body?

This awareness is a step to a healing journey that will allow you to maintain your homeostasis and live the life that you deserve.

You are not alone.

We are all human with unique experiences and are doing our best to survive in this world. A journey of healing is a beautiful mess that unleashes some of the best parts of ourselves. If you are ready to see a therapist in this part of your journey, you can check out the post on how to find a therapist here. You are so strong and resilient!